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SALT SHOTGUN AND FIRE SURPRISES


JAMES: You know what time it is. ALEKS: Welcome back to the Amazon show. JAMES: Yeah, it is I’m not even gonna correct you this time because I don’t care. ALEKS: What the fuck dude. JAMES: I don’t care in fact I don’t care about this show anymore. As a matter of fact Give me all my presents back. ALEKS:No. JAMES: I want each and every one of my presents back that I’ve given you over the course of the year –ALEKS:No fuck you– because you’re ungrateful –ALEKS: You’re a bitch.– JAMES: I want all of them back. ALEKS: No JAMES: Can I have one of them back? ALEKS: I’m putting a physical force between us JAMES: I got a present for you, and if your fucking ungrateful I’m gonna take it back without a –ALEKS: No I got a present for you–without a second guess ALEKS: Stop it’s my turn. JAMES: No, it’s my turn. It’s my turn, you went first last time for a long time ALEKS: Did I? JAMES: I don’t know I just said that JAMES: It’s my turn ALEKS: No, I didn’t you went first last time. JAMES: Let me go first ALEKS: You went first last time you just use that against me ALEKS: But you were wrong ALEKS: Cut back to footage ALEKS: Then you got on amazon.com ALEKS: Come on you see that JAMES: Fine. ALEKS: I got you a really good gift. JAMES: I was trying to like actually JAMES: Nevermind just give it to me JAMES: has to do with God? *PUNCHING STABBING SCREAMING NOISES* ALEKS: called Prison-style JAMES: What is this? ALEKS What’s that? James: No phone Original, no storage, no headphone jack, no Wi-Fi: a fake phone for people addicted to real phones ALEKS: I noticed you constantly textin’ You’re on that twitter you just posted a tweet. How many minutes ago? JAMES: That was like two hours ago. ALEKS: TEN minutes ago JAMES: why would I? ALEKS: What I feel like you could do with this is instead of ALEKS:I’m typing away –JAMES: How much did you pay for this?–with a whole bunch of YouTube stuff You have a physical object much like this cow. JAMES: look I’m sorry that I haven’t given up on YouTube quite just yet alright *WHOOSHING* JAMES: What is the no-phone? The no phone is a technology for the alternative *JAMES MUFFLED* Step 1) pick it up. Step 2) to hold it. There’s no features to this JAMES: There’s no ALEKS: what’s that? JAMES:There’s it’s just a piece of plastic that I? Hello *SCREAM* JAMES: This is probably the worst gift I’ve ever received in my life. ALEKS: That’s not true I’ve gotten you –JAMES: my mom’s bought me some horrible gifts, and this is this is ranking up there This is what is this?–ALEKS: So you’re telling me this isn’t going to help you cope with your elec…electric…anxiety? JAMES: gives JAMES: who the..*chuckles* Fuck is this? ALEKS: Wait? Are their faces photoshopped? JAMES: I mean ALEKS: one the far right JAMES: they look pretty real to me JAMES:That’s actually the co-founder and organ donor he donated an organ to make this product happen It’s completely toilet bowls resistant. I mean should we test that out? Alright, maybe I should Do toilet test then ALEKS: It’s not gonna work JAMES: Still works. Surprisingly well-rounded gift. Hey, I think it still works. Oh ALEKS: Oh excellent toss. Oh eww dude come on man that was in the toilet It was in the place where we go poop and pee JAMES:Urinal. It was in the urinal ALEKS: aww that’s not as bad That’s heavy. The fuck is this part two and part one–JAMES: this goes with that– ALEKS: Opening ups the best PART JAMES: it’s not Christmas you don’t get the enjoyment of everything ALEKS: ooo JAMES: what’s in there? put it on the table ALEKS: idk I can’t read JAMES: Put it on the table put it on the table right there. ALEKS: There are some flies JAMES: Huh, what are those going to be used for? ALEKS: I don’t know dude probably something stupid like every fucking week, salt wow salt and flies ALEKS: please I Cannot wait to see what this product is JAMES: I’ve been trying to get you this product for a long time And it was actually I want to say banned from being delivered I could not get it delivered here because of some kind of rule and regulation, but it’s been lifted and Thus it’s here today ALEKS: I mean it’s some high-powered air capacitator rifle beam JAMES: I mean close ALEKS: whoa fuck JAMES it’s the bug assault you just load that bad boy up with some salt and then you shoot I Got you like targets ALEKS: that was Morton. What caliber is that? JAMES: five ALEKS: I don’t know what I’m doing JAMES: opening up the salt ALEKS: It’s broken I open it up wrong JAMES: nice….. Nice……..Salty Okay, can you shoot an actual specimen? AT SAME TIME: WOOOOW BIIIITCH JAMES: IT actually works ALEKS: *UNCLEAR* time to die whoo JAMES: Where you taking that gun? ALEKS: I’m gonna do me some hunting JAMES:where you taking that gun? JAMES: Don’t think there’s any bugs in here. ALEKS There’s a big bug right over there man ALEKS: There’s a fucking big bug over there Hi, I’m coyote Peterson, and there’s a big bug in this office Yo, this thing’s great. It’s a regular house spider. Oh *SAD MUSIC* Oh My God. Yo, it’s fucked up *PAIN* Ow ALEKS: Oh it’s out JAMES: look it’s my grandfather ALEKS: Yo why is he so loaded?
JAMES: fuckin ready to take some motherfuckers down? JAMES:What? ALEKS: what? ALEKS: Get this outta here Trevor you’re suppose to clean up the set? Clean up the fucken set Clean up the set TREVOR: What the fuck TREVOR: You’re making a mess. ALEKS: Huh? You fucking bug JAMES: That’s a lot of salt by the equipment ALEKS: It’s not even real is it? JAMES: It’s…… *ALEKS SPITTING* JAMES: is it a rumba? JAMES: Aww man It’s a D-Bot.. What the fuck is a D-Bot? JAMES: It’s a rumba.ALEKS: It’s a rumba. JAMES: It’s a rubric called a D-Bot ALEKS: Now the D-Bod is a floor cleaning robot good for hard surfaces and low poly urethane Hardwood floors as well as carpets some carpets JAMES: you did’nt happen to uhh Leave it at home. Did you? You decide to use this shit for yourself. ALEKS: I have to test it out Come on Trevor. Let’s go. We don’t need this. JAMES: did you even put the filter in? ALEKS: let’s bring this out there *GAG NOISE* JAMES: What is the charging station for? ALEKS: here it is, you got to hold it first JAMES: What is the charging station for ALEKS: huh? JAMES: Why is there like a bait–What the fuck ALEKS: Ahh shit It’s not supposed to do that. Here JAMES: What? You control it from this? ALEKS: Yes, dude JAMESS: I thought a rumba’s supposed to be smart and it’s just supposed to work and do its own job ALEKS: It’s not a rumba stop saying rumor that the brands not affiliated D-bot JAMES: Play D bot Play play D-Bop ALEKS: D-bot you –JAMES: D-bop play–connected to the Wi-Fi? JAMES: what? *BEEP NOISES* *ALEKS’ THROWS SOMETHING* TREVOR: STOP Dude JAMES: Hey my present’s under there! JAMES: My Presence Under There JAMES: Dude! JAMES: My fuckin Present Jesus what the fuck! DUDE! It’s like Fuckin game of thrones in here I can’t Can’t I’m walking away from this JAMES: AHHH IT”S OVER HERE TOO *SLAP* TREVOR: fucker *SLAPPING AND JAMES GRUNTING* JAMES: It doesn’t go out JAMES: What the fuck my present’s over there DUDE MY PRESENT’S OVER THERE TREVOR: Your box is on fire ALEKS: Oh Fuck JAMES: MY PRESENT!!! MY PRESENT’S IN THERE DUDE JAMES: DON’T YOU KNOW THIS PLACE –TREVOR: WE NEED YOUR HELP–HELP!!!! *TREVOR* GET HELP! CALL 911 JAMES: *YELLING* FUCK ALEKS: Do we have uh like a an ad read or something for this part. JAMES: DUDE! THAT…FUCKING..YO!!! TREVOR: THE COUCH!!! THE COUCH!!! JAMES: THE COUCH!!!!!!! JAMES: THAT IS A FIRE haha WHAT THE FUCK TREVOR: HELLLP!!!! JAMES: What the fuck what the fuck! OH MY GOD haha *GRUNTING AND SLAPPING NOISES* TREVOR: Asher go help I’ll film, I’ll film *CRASHING AND JAMES HITTING NOISES* JAMES: That is seriously on you. *JOE POURS WATER ON JAMES* JAMES: AWW WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING DUDE?!? YOU LITERALLY HIT ME ALEKS: Joe spread it *JAMES HITTING THE FIRE CONSTANTLY SAYING FUCK AND DUDE* ALEKS: so water *JAMES ON THE FLOOR GROANING* UNKOWN SPEAKER: YOU ALRIGHT? NEW INTERN(MAYBE?): This is my first week TREVOR:HAHAHAHA SOMEONE: Need more SOMEONE: Where? TREVOR: It’s inside JOE:How did that happen? JAMES: Aleks fucking lit it up JAMES: You know my fucking present was? IT WAS A KEEPSAKE IT WAS A KEEPSAKE TO REPRESENT OUR FRIENDSHIP JAMES:And you burn it! you burned it to the fucking ground! JAMES:You burn half our set to the ground Just like our FRIENDSHIP!!!! JOE: I’m gonna order fire extinguishers on Amazon real quick. JAMES: SHUT UP!!! *BRANDING NOISE AND COW MOOING* Hey guys, thanks for watching this episode of Amazon prime time superpower Hour show If you liked it give a thumbs up, make sure to check out other videos, subscribe, and there’s a merch link as well Where you can get cool shirts, not like this one. Don’t get this one We got like hats and stuff and maybe maybe we can afford fire extinguishers next episode TREVOR:it’s kinda hot in here

100 thoughts on “SALT SHOTGUN AND FIRE SURPRISES

  1. >Aleks starts a fire

    >only stomps on a box to make it worse

    >stands back and doesnt help

    one of the biggest asshole moves that Aleks has done

  2. James scans the packages, looking for which one to open next, while Alexs stares, amazed at how quickly the fire is spreading.

  3. the only one calm is aleks bc he did it LMFAO thats pretty messed up but i bet he didn't want to feel that bad so he was acting like it wasn't a big deal

  4. man to think this was two years ago, i'm gonna miss James (I wish him and everyone at Cow chop the best for their future!)

  5. Joe thinking: oh yeah I got this, ima put it out!

    throws water on James

    James: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!

  6. The Joke used to be that Aleks channel was dying 2:06

    Now it's cowchop that caught ImmortalHD's hepatitis. And is dying

  7. Aleks is a fucking idiot, has a totally punchable face too. Fire the mother fucker like he fired the couch.

  8. I like to view the beginning of the episode and then skip ahead to one frame in the middle of the disaster. Then i like to try and figure out "how does this episode devolve into THAT"

    I was baffled with this one.

  9. I’m waiting for one of the cowchop members to pull out the bug assault out of storage and use it against the roaches they have

  10. The fact that James could’ve curb stomped that shit into submission. Or the fact it took longer to put this fire out

  11. Rewatching old eps makes me remember how Asher and Ana seemed perfect for each other. They reminded me of Jim and Pam from the office in an odd way

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