Do you hate your life?
Yes. Do you hate your neighbor?
Hey, can I borrow your tractor and not return it?
Yeah…. Do you hate your pet? (Bark)
(Bark) Do you hate your neighbors pet?
Yes. Let me tell you son, now you don’t have to worry about any of those Because now you have the Hand Gun. HOLY SHCABOODALS! This gun is so shinny. How does it work?
Umm okay How do I use it? Using the handgun is as simple as pointing and shooting All’s what you need is bullets, and your own imagination.
(bullets sold separately) Why don’t you try it out? Okay
(Gunshot) WOW! I just lost 30% of my hearing! Hey, I just noticed you shot my dididididdlydodog. No problem. I’ll just get a bigger, louder dog to anininoy you even more-
(Gunshot) Wow, this gun makes me feel really good! It’s almost like magic! I smell lead! Did I mention you can get rid of no-living annoyances too?
No, you didn’t. Well guess what? It can get rid of non-living annoyances too! (It can get rid of non-living annoyances too) WOW! Like what? A toaster
(Explosion) Walls that don’t already have holes in them
(Explosion) And more
(4 explosions) WOW! It’s like this thing was invented years ago! Haha, wouldn’t that be funny…. Regular handguns cost Billions and trillions of dollars and are hard to carry But the handgun is super light And can be gripped with just one hand You got two hands, right? I don’t have any hands But now I do! You can thank the handgun for that one because it’s magic Now let’s hear what other people have to say about the handgun
It’s alright WOW! Listen to their enthusiasm! They must really like the handgun!
I’m impressed So are you ready to order?
No. Well maybe the price will convince you. As I stated before, regular handguns go for billinos and trillions of dollars But you can get the ultra-light, strong, and durable handgun for the low low low low low LOW Price of just the small amount of $1919.95 Wow, I’m impressed. I now think I need and deserve this. How do I order? Like this To order the handgun please call 212-660-2245 or send $1919.95 plus shipping, handling, sales tax, employers tax, Federal withholding tax, county tax, SUI, FUTA, FICA social and medicare payments to 12 thisisfakestreet Milwaukeewhydoyoucare, Wisconsin, 91210